From David Powlison:
The simplest question to ask about what underlies anger is, “What do I really want?” If you are honest, with God’s help, you can recognize if you really crave to get even, or to hurt someone, or not to be inconvenienced, or to prove someone wrong, or to score points, or to be recognized and appreciated, or to humiliate, or to win, or to get your way. You are ruled by what the Bible terms “self.”
SOURCE: David Powlison, "Understanding Anger: Part 1" Journal of Biblical Counseling 14, no. 1 (1995): 52.