vassal of the King

 THE PARENT'S ROLE IN SPANKING Geoffrey R. Kirkland Proverbs 25:15 states that a soft answer breaks the bone.  Proverbs 15:1 affirms that a gentle answer turns away wrath. Proverbs 23:26 is the heart of every parent to the child as it says: “Give me your heart my son, and let your eyes delight in my ways.”   These verses provide much-needed guidance for parents who must obey the Lord and discipline wayward children. Knowing that parents must spank but also knowing and learning how to to spank appropriately and with gospel-grace, parents have an important part as well in this discipline process.  Parents cannot be given to anger because the one who is quick-tempered exalts folly (Proverbs 14:29). Parents must discipline with a calm demeanor. Parents cannot go into the room to discipline the child while seething with rage or furious because of something that happened. It may behoove the parent to take a few minutes quietly to repent of his own selfish and sinful response, to confess

THE WHAT & WHY OF SPANKING Geoffrey R. Kirkland Christ Fellowship Bible Church  Picture it: a mom or a dad is with the small child in that room, rod in hand, child on the lap, and discipline must occur because the child has sinned against God. What should the parent do, then? What is to be said? What is to be done? Perhaps the parent thinks: “I’ve never seen this done before” or “no one taught me how to do this.” This essay provides a handful of helpful tips for parents to consider as a template for the biblical process of discipline. 1. Gather the facts. Ask the child: “what happened?” In this beginning step, you as the parent seek to hear the child portray what happened (if the child is old enough to do so). Seek to hear him describe the situation. 2. Reach the heart. Since the goal of discipline is not merely behavioral management but seeking to get at the heart, parents should ask: “how did you respond?” “When ___ happened, why did you do that?” “When he said that, why did you

 THE WHY OF SPANKING Geoffrey R. Kirkland Christ Fellowship Bible Church The question inevitably comes up from parents who love their children and wonder how spanking can be helpful and beneficial for the children.  Why would a loving parent inflict pain to the children?  Won’t this hurt and harm them?  Won’t they become abusive when they grow older or view spanking as abuse that they have received?  What if someone had a very bad experience growing up with spanking from angry parents who angrily disciplined?  Many questions such as these often arise.   At this point, I must clearly affirm the reality that God’s Word must remain the authority for Godly fathers and mothers.  Past experiences, however good or bad they may have been, cannot sway how we view or interpret God’s Word or whether we choose to obey what God calls us to. Our own feelings in the moment of what we think is or is not best for our children should be subservient to the clear and authoritative Word of God on every iss

 THE WHEN OF SPANKING  Geoffrey R. Kirkland Christ Fellowship Bible Church THE WHEN OF SPANKING Parents should spank the children when sin has occurred .  Biblical discipline must come at the right time. When a parent spanks his child out of anger or because the parent views his rights violated, the child will be exasperated, become hardened, and he will be unsure in the future as to whether or not he’ll be disciplined for this or that action. Proverbs 22:15 speaks of foolishness that is bound up in the heart of the child. This Hebrew word for “foolishness” carries the idea of ‘moral perversion’ and ‘lack of fear of God.’  Parents must understand the importance of spanking and undertake the diligence in using the rod when the child has sinned. It is wise for parents to refrain from spanking the child for childishness.  If a child acts in a childish way that is not sinful, that action does not deserve a spanking (e.g., spilling the milk, performing a chore in a wrong manner). If, howeve

 SPANKING, part 2 THE IMPORTANCE OF SPANKING  Geoffrey R. Kirkland Christ Fellowship Bible Church  2.  THE IMPORTANCE OF SPANKING One clearly understands even in a cursory survey of Proverbs that utilizing the rod to reprove and discipline children is necessary. No one can deny that spanking is biblical. It is the ordained method that God has given for the discipline and instruction of wayward children.  Proverbs 22:15 says that the rod of discipline removes folly from the child’s heart.  Parents must strike their children with the rod and must understand that it will not kill the child, but it will help them (Proverbs 23:13). Implementing the rod when children disobey is a “rescue” mission to save their souls from death (Proverbs 23:14). Both the rod and reproof give wisdom to sinning children (Proverbs 29:15). One who does not use the rod but insists that the child will “figure it out” or the parent who allows the child to get his or her own way is a shameful way of parenting (Prover

SPANKING Geoffrey R. Kirkland CHRIST FELLOWSHIP BIBLE CHURCH INTRODUCTION Prov. 22:15 Foolishness is bound up in the heart of a child;  The rod of discipline will remove it far from him. Prov. 23:13-14  Do not hold back discipline from the child,  Although you strike him with the rod, he will not die.  You shall strike him with the rod And rescue his soul from Sheol. Prov. 13:24 He who withholds his rod hates his son,  But he who loves him disciplines him diligently. God commands parents to obey Him in the training and disciplining of young children. The Scriptures provide the reliable and understandable guide for parents to deal with the sin of little boys and girls. Contrary to the thinking of secularists today, and even many in the church, spanking does not hurt, harm, or abuse a child, when the parents execute it biblically, humbly, consistently, and lovingly. Spanking does not harm or destroy children. It does not set them up for a life of abuse or self-harm. Rather, God declares